Finding Your Tribe

Once in a while, a homeschool mom finds another homeschool mom who just breathes grace. Grace and hope and encouragement. Just what one needs to continue on one more day, week, semester . . . someone like my friend Tina. Tina Nahid wrote the beautiful Moments of Grace that whispers fresh life into a tired soul. When you’re ready to put away the useless formulas and burdensome failures, take a moment of grace with Tina. Here’s a cup of tea with her today.

Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.

–Ecclesiastes 4:9 (NLT)

When I first ventured out on my homeschool journey, I had the mindset that I could start this new endeavor all on my own. Once I set my mind to it, I was determined to make it happen! I voraciously devoured every book and article on home education, and therefore I thought I was pretty well prepared to take the leap. Let’s just say I was a tad naïve!

The first few years of homeschooling were very isolating for me, yet I persevered regardless of the lack of community. I didn’t really know any other alternative. Thankfully, as the years have gone by, homeschooling has grown exponentially and many groups and support systems have formed. This is a wonderful occurrence that is beneficial in every way; physically, emotionally and spiritually for us as women.

We desperately need our tribe!

As I began to reach out and find a community of grace-based women, my perspective and attitude began to change, for the better! I felt encouraged, understood, less stressed and more relaxed, which is something we all not only want but need.  And because of the sense of community and encouragement that I began to experience, I felt empowered to continue this journey of educating my children at home.

We are not and cannot be islands in our homeschooling adventure.

It isn’t good for us as women to be isolated from other women. We weren’t created to be alone. Finding friends who are emotionally safe and spiritually sound can take time and effort, but the benefits are well worth it!  Having another mom who “has your back,” who prays for you and your family, who encourages you and speaks life into your circumstances and trials is a blessing far beyond recognition. I don’t honestly know where I would be at this point, 17 years into my career as a stay-at-home, homeschooling mom if it weren’t for my circle of friends.

For those of us who are of a more introverted nature, we especially can fall into the belief that doing it alone is acceptable and sustainable. Yet, in most cases, it is neither. We still need at least a few friends who we can reach out to, have community with and spend time together. It isn’t optional; it is essential. For our wellbeing in the long-term, friendships built on trust, encouragement and loyalty enhance our lives in every way. They serve as an extension of God’s unconditional love and grace toward us in our everyday lives.

With the opportunities that are now available for connection on social media, there is no excuse for us as women not to reach out and find community. There are many homeschool groups online in which we can find comfort and support as well. Our local communities, unless we live in a very rural or isolated area, likely have some type of support group. And if they don’t, we can always pray and consider starting our own. Remember, it’s a healthy choice for both now and the future. It’s healthy for us as moms and women, healthy for our children and our husbands as well. Be blessed and go find your tribe!

Tina Nahid is a wife to her husband Nami and mother to Abraham, Micah and Ellie and has been a stay-at-home, homeschooling mom for 17 years. She has an MA in English and an advanced diploma in Biblical Counseling and is an author of two devotional books for homeschool moms, including Moments of Grace. She and her family reside in Kentucky.

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MasterBooks Elementary Bible and English Grammar Review

ENGLISH IS ONE of those critical subjects (you know, “readin’, ritin’, and ‘rithmetic). All students need a solid foundation in their language, the skill to communicate effectively their entire lives.

I have enjoyed teaching English, even years before I became an author. For one, I love to read (and help my children love reading). And grammar is fun (seriously), once you learn the basics.

But once my students have those basics down, once they understand how to read for themselves and identify major parts of speech, I let them study independently. Workbooks that are “grab and go” make teaching English simple; I can check the work while they get an excellent education.

The problem for classical and Charlotte Mason homeschoolers is finding that balance between easy homeschooling and teaching the real “why” behind the lessons. MasterBooks Elementary Bible and English Grammar gives students a great balance of both.

MasterBooks Bible and English Grammar

Fourth, fifth, and sixth graders who have a grasp of parts of speech and sentence structure will benefit from Bible and English Grammar. This unique combination offers one year of study combining both subjects. The course is truly remarkable.

The course contains two books. First, the student reads from Illustrated Family Bible Stories.  This hardcover Bible story book is the basis of the course reading and comprehension. The volume includes stories from Genesis through Revelation. Throughout the book are included beautiful illustrations and even illustrated marginal notes for greater understanding. The beginning of each major section of the Bible includes an overview of the books included, a map, and cultural and historical information so the student will better understand the context. The back of the book gives a Bible reference section including pictures and information about daily life in biblical times, information about plants and animals referenced, explanation of the different places mentioned in Scripture, and a list of Biblical characters and who they are, and even questions with page references for the answer. The book ends with a comprehensive index.

The second book in the course is called the Parent Lesson Planner. This book is actually the student workbook for the course. The first several pages offer an informal yet easy-to-use lesson plan. The plan is broken up into weeks and semesters for easy use, and each day offers a space for students to check off the work is completed and for the parent to record the grade.

The bulk of the book, however, consists of worksheets for the student’s use. Each lesson is printed on the front and back of one page. The page begins with the required short reading assignment. The week’s verse, suitable for memorization, is printed at the top. Next, the student is given several biblical terms to define from the reading. A section of questions for reading comprehension is also included in each lesson. At least one writing assignment based on the story is also included.

The worksheets also contain several grammar exercises that may or may not be loosely tied to the day’s reading. Students work on grammar concepts like parts of speech, alphabetizing, sentence structure, and beginning paragraph structure. Most lessons include multiple writing assignments or grammar activities. While classical students will appreciate the copious writing opportunities, Charlotte Mason families will enjoy the activities included.

Overall, MasterBooks Elementary Bible and English Grammar is simple to use, consistent with the MasterBooks “open and go” teaching philosophy. Students with previous exposure to the parts of speech and who are strong independent readers will find the lessons short and straight-to-the-point.

The workbook does not include lines for students to write on, so our workbook quickly became messy and hard to use. When we switched to answering in a spiral notebook, this improved. We also found some of the writing assignments laborious for our fourth-grade student, even though he loves writing in his spare time. He often asked to compromise with one written paragraph a day, rather than the two or three assigned.

This course, then, is easy to teach, engaging for students, and simple to customize. I would recommend families consider taking a break from the usual grammar curriculum and enjoying the change of pace — and Biblical study — for one upper elementary year.

The parent lesson planner is designed to be consumable, but the hardcover Bible storybook will be treasured for years to come.

You can preview the book and workbook here.

Elementary Bible and English Grammar is published by Master Books and is available from their website as well as on Amazon and other bookstores.

Disclosure: I received a copy of this curriculum from the publisher for my own consideration. These opinions are my own. Affiliate links help support this site.

Books I’ve Been Reading (and one for you)

I’ve been doing quite a bit of reading lately. And it looks to be a particularly book-filled year. So I’ve decided to not only share some of my favorite reads with you . . . but actually send some of my favorite reads to you!

Every morning, I start my day with devotions and reading time. This habit, which I’ve practiced since I was a young girl, helps my mind and soul wake up while my body attempts to catch up. By keeping this date with myself — and reading extra on sick days and weekends — I can power through a few books a month.

Spoiler alert — I’m heavy into nonfiction. I know that fiction is good for me, but I just gravitate toward answers to burning questions. If you have a good fiction recommendation, please leave the title in the comments!

And as for how you can have one of these books for your own collection, just keep reading to the end.

Some Books that Made Me Think

. . . and highlight and copy in my journal and pray . . .

Treasures in Dark Places: One Woman, a Supernatural God and a Mission to the Toughest Part of India by Leanna Cinquanta

This book came as a surprise “thank you” gift from the publisher after I was granted the particular honor of interviewing the author for Ministry Today Magazine. Dr. Cinquanta is a modern-day “missionary hero” in India (the kind we used to listen to flip-a-card stories about in vacation Bible school) who is leading a native revival that just might end child trafficking in that country. Her autobiography is fascinating and challenging.

“This is the definition of poverty, I thought.

Then I knew I was wrong. This was not the definition of poverty. Poverty is a middle-class family that has no joy. Poverty is a wealthy family enslaved to fear and strife. According to the economy of the world, Saroy and Rita were poor. They lacked education. They lacked financial opportunity. They lacked what the developed world considers necessities of life.

But absence of material possessions hadn’t dampened Saroj and Rita’s joy. They were no longer slaves. They had escaped the chains under which their kinsmen labored. They had found Jesus, and with Him they had found peace and purpose. Now they walked with the authority of the King of whose kingdom they had become citizens. They were wealthy with a wealth no money could buy. The strangest notion swept over me. I stood in the presence of true royalty.”

— Treasures in Dark Places, p. 24

Rhythms of Rest: Finding the Spirit of Sabbath in a Busy World by Shelly Miller

This is the book I’ve needed my entire adult life. And I would have killed — killed — for it a decade ago when my family was literally falling apart under the pressure of ministry.  If you have ever groaned “There is no such thing as a day of rest!” or “Dog-gone it, I hate Sundays!” or even “I’ll rest when I die,” then this is the book for you.

Shelly gets it as only a pastor’s wife, author, and busy mom can.  She takes off the burden of Sabbath-keeping and replaces it with the blessing of resting.

“If we are created with intention by God for a specific purpose, and the way of discovering that purpose is through relationship with him, then the way of discovering what we are missing in life is through abiding with him on sabbath. A lack of intentionality when it comes to how we rest leads to a depleted life defined by what the world dictates. When we are overtied and dreading the alarm clock, we miss out on the hints toward happiness God is leaving for us. “Wasting time” is actually the most productive action you may take this week.”

— Rhythms of Rest, p 44

The Broken Way: A Daring Path into the Abundant Life by Ann Voskamp

There are two kinds of Christian readers: those who like Ann’s writing and those who don’t. I do, particularly on paper (I find her harder to read on a blog post). And with this book, Ann touches — no, hammers — on an aspect of Christianity that I am personally wrestling with right now: How do you reconcile your faith with a life shattered beyond repair?

Like I do with most Christian living best-sellers, I grabbed this from the library intending to skim it and return it. But after copying huge chunks of it into my journal, I purchased the hardcover to read again, highlight, and annotate.

“You are whatever you love. You are, at your very essence, not wwhat you think, but what you love. Open up God’s love letter to us — He say we’re all lovers compelled by our loves. We are all compelled not by what we believe is right, but by what we love the most. You are not driven by duties, you are not driven by doctrines; you are driven by what you ultimately desire — and maybe you don’t actually really love whatever you think you love?”

The Broken Way, p 117

Dark Nights of the Soul: A Guide to Finding Your Way Through Life’s Ordeals by Thomas Moore

This is an unusual recommendation from slightly outside my theological norm. Thomas Moore is Catholic and nearly New Age in his philosophy, but he tackles a fascinating question in this heavy read. What if the worst valleys of our lives, our times of deepest pain and turmoil, were not something to “get through as fast as possible” but instead a treasured teaching moment? What if we stopped praying for the trial to end and instead embraced it as a treasured part of life?

He likens our trials — physical illness, mental anguish, spiritual trials — to a dark night in which no discernable light or relief can be found. Like Jonah, stuck in the belly of a fish, unable to save himself or see any hope for his predicament. Yet that stinking suffering the dark was exactly what the prophet, and what we, need to carry us forward on our journey.

“The dark night saves you from being stuck in your small life. It makes you a hero. It grows you into your fate and into being a responsive member of your community. In your mother’s womb you were becoming a person. In your womb-like dark night you are becoming a soul.”

Dark Nights of the Soul, p 13

Bright Days, Dark Nights: with Charles Spurgeon in Triumph Over Emotional Pain by Elizabeth Ruth Skoglund

I wish I could remember who recommended this book to me, because it is a treasure! I never knew Spurgeon had so much to say about self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and other emotional trials. Spurgeon battled these just as much (if not more) than any of us, and he speaks across the century with compassion and hope. As an experienced counselor, Skoglund brings forward the biblical applications Spurgeon makes to very physical distress we all encounter.

“By all the casting down of his servants God is glorified, for they are led to magnify him when again he sts them on their feet, and even while prostrate in the dust their faith yields him prsie. They speak all the more sweetly of his faighfulness, and are the more firmly established in his love . . .  The lesson of wisdom is, be not dismayed by soul-trouble.” “Soul trouble” is a term for depression, downness, spiritual emptiness, discouragement such as experienced by many great epople of the Bible, which often appears in older writings but still well defines universally what we all experience from time to time. Says Spurgeon of such feelings: “Count it no strange thing, but a part of ordinary . . . experience. Should the power of depression be more than ordinary, think not that all is over with your usefulness . . . Even if the enemys foot be on your neck, expect to rise and overthrow him. Cast the burden of the present, along with the sin of the past and the fear of the future, upon the Lord, who forsaketh not his saints.”

Bright Days, Dark Nights, p 67

Of course, I highly recommend you check out Homeschool Made Easy and Rocking Ordinary if you haven’t already. 🙂

There are a few great reads for you to check out. Granted, this batch was pretty heavy stuff. I’m working on some poetry, a parenting book, and maybe a novel next. Be sure to recommend a good read to me in the comments!

Want me to send you one of these?

I’ll be mailing a copy of one of these books to a reader of my Genuine Homeschool Mom Newsletter next week. If you want to get in on the action, be sure to subscribe.

Read any good books lately?

I Got My Word of the Year Wrong (of course)

Do you pick a Word of the Year? It’s kinda’ the thing to do these days years. I have several friends who pick a word from the Lord to meditate on, to live out, to wrestle with through the year.

For the past couple of years, I’ve been fearful of picking the Word of the Year.  Because there are 171, 476 words in the English language and the chance of picking the right one word out of all of those is 0.00000583%. I did the math. I have a better chance of being struck by lightening. Again, I looked it up.

Last year was The Year of Lea Ann. Don’t roll your eyes, it was really a thing. The Year of David was two years previous, and it went . . . ok for him. But last January, all signs pointed to a Super Awesome Year of Amazing Things for Lea Ann. When my husband christened it in my honor, I had no objections.

Neither did the principalities, powers, and rulers of the darkness of this world, either (see Ephesians 6). The year 2016 will go down in history as one of the most brutally difficult of my entire life, with a major life event or trauma occurring every 2-4 weeks. I could not wait for that year to end!

(Pray for me, this year is not much easier so far.)

Just as predicted, I got my word wrong this year.

In my defense, I was very, very close. I picked prayer. You may sense why a woman physically and spiritually and emotionally exhausted might say, “Hey, let’s spend more time beseeching the Good Lord for favor this year.” It seemed like a no-brainer.

I do need prayer. That much is certain. But the prayer, it seems, is a byproduct of what Jesus wants for me now more than ever.

“Are you resting?” my friend Kim asked me last week. Of course I’m resting. I took several weeks off during the holidays to literally do nothing. I’m sleeping now more than ever. I’m ashamed at how little I’ve accomplishing lately. Lazy? Probably. Resting? Like a boss.

Kim was not impressed with my bragging. She insisted I go home and ask my husband if I’m good at resting and if I am kind to myself. So I did. I marched home, picked up the phone, and proceeded to argue with my husband at how efficient and optimal my resting game is.

Then I ranted at him for an hour about how frustrated I was at being double-booked for two responsibilities in separate states one weekend this spring . . . while I cooked a dinner I had no time to eat and raced out the door to a meeting I was late for.

My meeting let out 15 minutes early that night. I raced back home for a precious few moments of peace and quiet before the rest of the family returned home. Warming up some leftovers, I jumped in bed and reached for a book from the pile of guilt, the books I need to read, promised to read, should have read long ago. Next in line: Rhythms of Rest: Finding the Spirit of Sabbath in a Busy World by Shelly Miller.

Rest is ill-defined when we value our time and our worth based on productivity.

If we are created with intention by God for a specific purpose, and the way of discovering that purpose is through relationship with him, then the way of discovering what we are missing in life is through abiding with him on Sabbath. A lack of intentionality when it comes to how we rest leads to a depleted life defined by what the world dictates. When we are overtired and dreading the alarm clock, we miss out on the hints toward happiness God is leaving for us. “Wasting time” is actually the most productive action you may take this week.

– Shelly Miller

Rhythms of Rest, p 44

Wasting time? Did she actually say that? I started hyperventilating as my todo list screamed through my head. I hadn’t folded the laundry, finished my edits, or practiced my violin today. None of the children had a music lesson from me this week . . . again. Overdue library books, unanswered emails, unfinished articles . . .

“As we practice taking our hands off creation, we begin to believe God is trustworthy while we put faith in action.”

I was right to confess to my friend Joanna last month that my faith is lacking. But rather than shrug it off and run back to my anxious running and frantic listing, God is calling me to rest.

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

— Matt. 11:28-29

It’s the year of rest.

I’m slowly chewing on every page of Rhythms of Rest, highlighting and copying and considering how resting every week — and every day — demonstrates my rest in God, facilitates resting in prayer, and provides rest and refreshment to my loved ones.

And while I’m at it, this year I’m giving up busy for Lent. Don’t laugh, this is a hard one for me. I’ll be using Shelly’s free ebook A Sabbath Journey for Lent as a guide while setting aside sundown Saturday to sundown Sunday as sacred rest.

And I’m actively looking for God’s rest every day, from exhales in the backyard to tea and books in bed. It sounds easy, but it’s a mental battle for me every hour. Pray with me?

Are you good at resting?

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Fighting the Devotional Battle

Truth be told, I stuff my face far more often than my soul. There’s an urgency to mealtime, an ingrained habit of snacking that doesn’t easily translate to the spiritual disciplines of prayer and Bible reading.

And I say that to my shame.

You know what? I’m taking a big risk by being honest about that, because it’s much cooler to post a Bible meme on social media or a picture of my coffee mug with my devotional journal or to use trendy translations in Facebook statuses than to admit the harsh, human truth: I didn’t have devotions today. Or worse, to honestly say, “I read through my daily Bible reading, but two hours later I had already forgotten every word of it. I raided the refrigerator twice in the same amount of time.”

The fact of the matter is that this is a struggle we don’t always win. It doesn’t matter if we schedule Quiet Time early in the morning or during baby’s naptime or late at night. It helps only moderately that we carry every translation known to mankind on our smart phones and purse-sized tablets and can listen to a devotional reading in the bathroom or in the car or in the kitchen. The gospel truth is we’re distracted. All the time. And we hunger after all the wrong things.

Two thousand years after Christ urged us to hunger and thirst after Him, we remain distracted from the most important thing, and it’s starving us spiritually — you and me, both.

I can recall times I was faithfully — almost monastically — devoted to Bible reading and prayer. Years when teenaged Lea Ann clung to the morning disciplines to obtain favor from a Heavenly God who seemed the most demanding, impossible-to-please parent of all; early adulthood’s dark months of desperate clinging to the Psalms and pleading cries to a ceiling of brass for mercy, grace, and forgiveness from a depressing shame; the frantic Bible readings, Scripture memory, and repeated prayers through months of loneliness, pain, and loss. The lean years of trials and palpable soul-hunger that literally drove me to my arthritic knees in an attempt to win grace from the Almighty Deliverer.

When you’re starving, you can think of nothing but food.

But just like our physical bodies can’t live constantly in a crisis state, neither can our souls. That’s why God brings relief from trials, provision for each day, and rest every night. “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning” (Psalms 30:5; NJKV). When our cravings are satisfied, we are free to relax and notice our other blessings, other opportunities, other activities.

And then . . . we get distracted.

I don’t know why my stomach clock is more consistent than my soul clock. I can’t go but a few hours before my body reminds me that the refrigerator is full. But I could remain busy for days before realizing I’m behind on my Bible reading plan. There just isn’t the same urgency.

That’s my fault for allowing myself to be distracted. I spend more time scrolling social media than searching the Scriptures. I complain about the weather more than I pray for souls. I “like” funny memes more than I praise the Creator. The disgusting truth is that I’m so full of the world’s junk food that I’ve lost my appetite for healthy soul food.

Because I know in my brain and in my heart that nothing else will satisfy. I know that social media and TV and new clothes and better decorating and a heaping plate of beefy goodness will not satiate my seething desires. I know that no matter how large I grow on the scale, food and drink will not complete me — only God Himself can fill me up.

Only Scripture contains God’s breathing, His very life force. Only God’s Word gives me lasting value, knowledge, truth, protection, instructions, and purity. Only God’s Word will fill me up and complete me so that I can boldly face everything God wants me to do and to become (to paraphrase 2 Timothy 3:16–17). God intends my devotions to be just that — my heart turned devotedly back to my Creator.

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Those words from Rocking Ordinary still come back to me each morning when the alarm clock rings a little too early and the battle over devotions begins. I’m too tired, my schedule too packed, my mind too distracted to give this most important relationship the attention and discipline it deserves.

My friend Angela knows the struggle, too.

As women, we wear a dozen hats, while we juggle an armload of balls. It’s easy to let the noise and mess around us become our focus until we are completely distracted and exhausted. How can we keep from running aground on all of the mess and demand of our busy, daily lives? How can we rise up and face each day with the fresh strength and joy of the Lord? How can we see ourselves as the warriors God says we are? For some of us, it’s easier to give grace than to receive it, and as a result, we find ourselves dryer than a desert in the middle of a drought. Let’s not wait until our sanity is rolling away with the tumbleweeds! Instead, let’s meet at the well of His Word. He has given us everything we need to not just survive another day, but to live victoriously as warriors in His strength. This Bible Study Journal for Busy Women will help guide you through a daily time of plugging into our true power source, suiting up for the battle, filling our canteen with living water, and rising up in the power of our Mighty God. We can live stronger and braver lives.

What Bible study journal? This one, The Warrior in the Mirror.  Each page is full of prompts to jog your memory, encourage your heart, and propel you forward in your relationship with God:

• record the song you are meditating on
• write out your prayer, including praises, requests, and worship
• affirm your beliefs through “I trust you with . . .” prompts
• copy Scripture
• even doodle while you meditate

This full-sized journal includes several different page designs. Angela’s thoughtful and creative designs compel users to slow down and think about what these fleeting moments with God mean.

Does it work? Can a Bible study journal make a difference in our devotional life? I handed the book to my teen daughter to try, asking her for an unbiased opinion a few weeks in. And guess what? She said the journal encouraged her to have a private devotional time more frequently. One afternoon, she texted me from work:

I really love how it gives room for everything and reminds me to be thankful, not just to ask. I love how it’s beautiful, and it makes me want to use it.

A peek into my daughter’s Warrior in the Mirror Journal

The Warrior in the Mirror

You can buy your own paperback copy of The Warrior in the Mirror from Amazon here (what a great gift for a friend or family member!). And you can download the printable version directly from the author here.

What do you use for your devotions?

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